Overcoming Heartbreak Pt. 1-How to Start Healing Now
Five tips to begin healing now
Anyone that’s ever had a broken leg will tell you that heartbreak is far more crippling than anything physical could ever be.
You see the thing about heartbreak is that no matter how careful you are, you can still end up on the receiving end of a soul-crushing, debilitating broken heart. You can build a wall of life lessons that seemingly make you impermeable but, someone can come along, tear down your walls, and rip your heart right out of your chest. Or so it feels.
Now, I’m not talking about a bruise to the ego type of broken heart. I’m talking about the one you never forget. The kind where you can barely remember the person’s name, but you can still feel the ache in your chest when you remember how it made you feel. How it made you question everything about yourself and life as you knew it.
So how do you fix the agonizing hole in your chest, where once the “love of your life” lived? I won’t lie, getting through it takes a lot of effort and time. And to add insult to serious injury, it rarely goes the way you’d like. Extreme pain and suffering can turn you into a different person. The beauty is, you get to decide if that new person is someone you’re proud of or someone you’re not.
The mind, being the superpower that it is, has the ability to visit the past, present, future and back again. We can use that power to begin a path of healing that not only helps us to finally relax into where we are but, design a life that’s even better than before. Here are five tips to start healing with your head held high and your dignity intact.
1. Accept the Breakup. Easier said than done, I know. Practice at first, true acceptance will come in time.
2. Grieve. When we allow ourselves to grieve the loss of someone important, we give ourselves permission to be hurt and to be human. This is huge.
3. No Contact. Going no contact is critical. Even if you tell yourself it’s only while you’re healing. No contact includes not only speaking to and seeing each other but social media stalking and any other ways of snooping.
*If you have children or some other business together, use this as a reminder to limit your emotional investment in any given situation.
Be brief, be clear, and be quick.
4. Change up Your Routine. Do something different every day. Take a different route to work. Listen to different music. Go to different places. The list is endless but you get what I mean.
5. Invest in Yourself! This has many layers but first, invest in a qualified mental health professional or support coach. You want to go for quality here. Sure, there are plenty of free resources out there but the key here is not only to get you back on your feet but to help you design a life of your dreams. This is a definite splurge area.
Note* friends can be a great source of support, though oftentimes, well-meaning, loving friends can steer us wrong. It’s best to invest in a professional and save your friends for distraction and fun. Believe me, they’ll thank you too.