Honoring the Post-Breakup Valentine’s Day suck!

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it can make heartbreak an overwhelming marathon of painful memories sprinkled in with feelings of inadequacy and failure. Ugh!

Valentine’s Day Blues

When you’re going through a breakup the last thing you want to have to endure is a day, scratch that, a week, that celebrates love and connection. And yet, everywhere you go you are bombarded by hearts and bears. All that red and “love is everywhere” crap can make even the most “in love” person feel overwhelmed, let alone someone who has just said goodbye to someone they never thought they never would. Valentine’s day after a breakup can feel like there’s a neon sign in your face that reads, DUMPED – BROKEN – DEFECTIVE- LOSER. FUCK!!

Maybe for Today

So, for today, this week, or even this month, honor Valentine’s day suck. Yes, I said it. Honor.

It sucks!

It hurts!

There’s so much power in honoring the suck, in honoring the pain instead of shoving it down and pretending. Pain is uncomfortable but the pain is also healing.

Think of it like this. If you break a leg and pretend it’s not broken, while you’re continuing to walk on it and use it, it will heal but misshapen and disfigured. It can’t heal properly. The same goes for the heart. When we pretend to be unaffected, we abandon ourselves. We also give up the opportunity to allow something to heal properly and to work its way through our hearts, our body’s and our minds so that it can work its way ALL THE WAY OUT!

I know it can feel super uncomfortable to let painful feelings feel painful. It might feel easier to ignore them or pretend they’re not there. I get it. I’ve been there. Sadly, doing that rarely works. Painful feelings come out eventually and when they do, it’s so much worse.

 YOU TOTALLY GOT THIS!

You got this! You’re brave! Are you giving yourself the props you deserve? Right now, at this moment, deciding to hurt is deciding to heal and it’s the most courageous thing you can do.